1. Recall some moments during the past year when you felt close to your mate.
He says
- Lang Tengah Holiday
- House hunting moments
She says
- When we talk all night long, sharing our dreams and visions
- During my birthday when he surprised me
- During his birthday, when we sat and talk under the stars
- When we serve together during children’s camp
- When we pray and worship together
2. During those times, how was selfishness defeated?
He says
- I thought of us and her rather than myself
- I wanted to have fun and not argue over anything to spoil the holiday, so with that I just let things down and just had fun, not to pick on anything and be fine with everything (by the way there was nothing to pick on it was just perfect)
She says
- As we set aside what we want personally and individually to enjoy each other’s company
- I just want to give and love him even more
3. Read John 12:24, 25; Luke 14:27-30 and Mark 10:43-45. Finish this sentence: When I’m being selfish, I need to …
He says
- Let old habits die / put it down or lay it aside that it may produce good
- Look at the greater good than just looking at what I want
- To serve my mate/spouse
She says
Die to self
- Die to my own needs and wants
- Let go of my rights and ego
- Die so that many seeds may grow
Realise the cost
- Remember that marriage is not about me
- Remember that building and retaining a marriage a cost and sacrifice is required
- Sacrifice of self needs and wants
Jesus came to serve and not to be served
- I too have to serve my husband, not only expecting my husband to serve all the time
- Serving is greatness
4. Read 1 Peter 3:8-12. List things you should do when your mate is being selfish
- Live in harmony
- Be sympathetic
- Love as brothers love
- Be compassionate
- Humble
- Do not repay evil with evil / insult with insult
- Repay with blessings
- Keep the tongue from evil
- Keep away from deceitful speech
- Turn from evil and do good
- Seek and pursue peace
5. What one thing will you do this week to show an unselfish attitude toward your mate and obey the word of Christ
He says
- Agree on something she says or wants to do (unless it is wrong/life threatening) although I want it my way
She says
- Not to get upset with him although I don’t agree with him
Discoveries we made while exploring these questions
- Serving is greatness
- It’s easier said than done
- We must remember the moments we felt close to one another more often
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July 1, 2010 at 8:19 am
You guys make things sound so perfect!
It does sound lovely!
July 1, 2010 at 1:21 pm
Yup it sounds perfect, but in reality it’s not, yet at the same time it is not an excuse for us not to keep working at it : )
August 14, 2010 at 6:50 am
Yeap, indeed it sounds perfect, and its easier said than done, but me being an “observant”, I’ve seen you both grow together, with each other and as one.
Really am taking you both as my role models, in my future relationships
God bless !!